The Comedy Button
What's going on, Internet!? Prepare for some of the most insane rambling about everything from life, to sex, to what passes for 21st-century Internet culture. Your aural canals are ours, and we're filling them with nonsense -- courtesy of hosts Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville. BRAAAP BRAAAP! New episode every Friday afternoon!

In our best post-Christmas Christmas episode ever, we can't figure out why people eat candy canes, Ryan doesn't have a clue what cream soda tastes like, and we've got some questions about Santa Claus. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep365.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

We're pretty sure criminals have ruined ski masks for everyone else, forever. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep364.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

We're here to tell tales from the Caramel Tasting Festival, give you some tips for dealing with stress, and figure out what kind of shoe we'd most like to be. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep363.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

We're cooking with SPORTS, baby. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep362.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

Ryan lives his entire life like the "BUT THERE MUST BE A BETTER WAY!" guy in the first 10 seconds of every infomercial. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep361.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

Max and Jenn regale us with stories of their Japanese honeymoon, where they discovered weird sex corners in every store, fought deer, and visited an amusement park. Starring Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guests Jenn Scoville and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep360.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

In this episode, we all ponder the stupid ways that we want to die, and also what should be written on our tombstones. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep359.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

Best He-Man character? Worst superpower? Least bad James Bond? We tackle 2018's key issues. Starring Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jack DeVries.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep358.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

It's our November after-Halloween spooktacular, with guest host Jack DeVries on-hand to talk candy mascots and help us figure out which movie monsters are the best at bangin' out. Starring Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jack DeVries.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep357.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PST

Sbarro sucks, Large Marge is (still) terrifying, and Scott can definitely be bribed to let himself be attacked by birds for an entire night. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep356.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

In this episode, we learn some fascinating facts about Taco Bell, edible panties, Amazin' Fruit, and the time that Brian got so excited for Home Alone 2 that he broke a window. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep355.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Welcome to the Comedy Button, a podcast full of old people who go to sad dad rock shows, get migraines all the time, and remember when prank phone calls were a thing. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep354.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Where in the world is Ryan Scott? Who knows -- but let's talk about fake streaming services, how dumb we were in our 20s, and what drives a person to hang out at Denny's for 24 hours. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep353.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 10:39am PST

Hey, Anthony's back for a totally rat-ical guest appearance! Since we last saw our old partner in crime, he got hitched, got some rats, lost some rats, got some other rats, got a catheter for one of those rats, and got a how-to book for being a rat doctor. You might say he's now the rat king. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Anthony Gallegos.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep352.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

It's time for our annual Comedy Button Awards, honoring the best movies of 1995. Also, we make fun of Rip Torn, and nerd out about prank call albums. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep351.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

For our 350th episode extravaganza, we fight sea creatures, play a fun game of "Would You Fellate Cthulhu?," and wince in pain as Ryan attempts to explain how he would plan our birthday parties. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep350.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

An oral history of Lunchables, as told by the Comedy Button. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep349.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Ryan is back from his month-long exile to the chicken nugget factory, just in time to answer life's difficult questions about Ninja Turtles tattoos. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep348.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Greetings from the RAM RANCH! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jenn Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep347.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 10:30am PST

Mrs. Scoville herself joins us to reflect on the big wedding day. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jenn Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep346.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

We have a record TWO WOMEN on our dumb idiot podcast this week, so of course we have to talk to them about Ninja Turtles and werewolves. Starring Brian Altano and Max Scoville, with special guests Jenn Scoville and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep345.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

This week, we figured it would be a good idea to design a tattoo for Ryan, figure out how to get him to eat weird exotic food, and stoke the fire of his eternal war with "film critic" Harry Knowles. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep344.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Who got the final rose at Max Scoville's The Bachelor party? Turns out, it was booze and Saturday morning cartoons. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep343.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Let's give it up to Spider-Man for starring in one of the best and worst games ever created by human beings on planet Earth. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep342.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Look out, Roger Federer -- secret tennis expert Ryan Scott is coming to take your job and all your sponsorships. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep341.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

We've got some awesomely stupid plans for Max's bachelor party (and some even stupider ones that we ultimately didn't go with!). Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep340.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

This week, Brian gets a good, healthy head start on embarrassing his daughter in front of all her school friends, with the story of her birth. Also: BRIAN'S A DAD NOW! How crazy is that!? Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep339.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

We've got some hot takes on Hot Topic, Brian cherishes his final pre-fatherhood moments, and we debate which cereal mascots are the most bangable. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep338.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

April is back this week to dish on Ryan's love affair with NCIS, and work out the mystery of her father-in-law's inability to understand how to order food at Chipotle. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest April Gibson.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep337.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Scientists found a dinosaur, a TV network found a conscience, and we found more Taft facts. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep336.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Have we ever missed a flight? How does Ryan feel about corn? Have any of us ever had an animal attached to our genitals? Who thought square pizza was a good idea? Would we eat a pizza shaped like America? We attempt to answer some of these questions, among others. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep335.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

This week, the love of Ryan's life joins us to corroborate the fact that he is a terrible cook, shed some light on their home life, and recount a near-fatal brush with an angry school of Swedish Fish. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest April Gibson.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep334.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

We bet you we can guess the plot of a stupid talking animal movie from the '80s, just from looking at the poster. BONUS SEGMENT: essential Old West train robbery tips, from local expert Jared Petty! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Ryan Scott, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep333.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

This week, we answer one of the most awful hypothetical questions that's even been posed to this show. Starring Scott Bromley and Max Scoville, with special guest Jack DeVries.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep332.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

We're joined once again by our old friend Jack to discuss awful lurid things like looking at porn, hiding porn, our favorite porn, porn pet peeves, and if we'll ever be embarrassed by stuff we talk about on this show (like porn). This is what happens when we crowdsource topics from our horrible Facebook group. Starring Scott Bromley and Max Scoville, with special guest Jack DeVries.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep331.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 12:00pm PST

Our pal Seth Macy gives us the inside scoop on living in Maine: The Stephen King State, the eldritch horror of relaxing island life, running a fake news site, and why he paid $600 to watch Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 in theaters. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Seth Macy.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep330.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

This week, we discuss the sexiest movies of all time according to clickbait robots, awful reality shows, guilty pleasures, problematic faves, and dogs. Look, we let Ryan host again, so it's a big mess. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep329.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Our pal Kristin joins us once again to regale us with sordid tales of finding love in Left 4 Dead, awful public transportation encounters, an unforgettable Harry Potter bathroom break, and much more. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep328.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Someone let Ryan host again, and you all know what that means: utter nonsense. Join us as we create a wizard's scroll, realize that early writing sounded more like pornsite comments, and discuss the finer points of collecting vs. hoarding. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Brandon Hunt.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep327.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Guest host Brandon Hunt shows us just how far one dedicated fan will go to hear the director's commentary for the '90s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Brandon Hunt.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep326.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Ryan managed to move somewhere even more boring than Sunnyvale, and he even watches Jeopardy every night, like the old man that he (not-so-) secretly is. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep325.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 12:30pm PST

Scott and Ryan cozy up in an intimate one-on-one episode, to talk about cool samurai movies and Wikipedia secrets. Starring Scott Bromley and Ryan Scott.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep324.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Brian has learned a terrifying, brain-scarring new truth about horses. Also, Ryan becomes God for a minute, and creates the world's most horrific nightmare animal (and we want your fan art). Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Ryan Scott.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep323.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

What interesting life statistic would we want to know when we die? We're science boys today, everyone! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep322.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

We have a serious talk about mental health, and a somehow equally serious talk about how many circus peanuts would kill a person. We swear that the former has nothing to do with the latter. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep321.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

One of us is finally becoming a father -- and he's never been more terrified. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep320.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Do all those those farm animals really believe they can get away with their hate crimes and loitering? Not if Cowlumbo the Cow Detective has anything to say about it. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep319.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Which one of us had a kids' birthday party in his 30s (hint: It's not who you think)? What are the worst (and best!) ice cream flavors? What is the dumbest pop culture monster? What's the tallest animal that a man can pee over? We only ask the hard questions here. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep318.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

This week, we have some adventures in FOOOOOOOOOOOOD! Except for Ryan, because he orders Subway sandwiches like he's Jeffrey Dahmer. Dude needs to have his head checked. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep317.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

You know who's better than everyone at everything? Kevin frickin' McCallister. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep316.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

It's hard to lose someone you love -- and believe us, we know. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep315.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST

Why are boobs weird (according to a woman)? What constitutes a god-tier pangus? And what should you shave before visiting a Japanese spa? Let's get this year off to a properly dumb start! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep314.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:30am PST