The Comedy Button
What's going on, Internet!? Prepare for some of the most insane rambling about everything from life, to sex, to what passes for 21st-century Internet culture. Your aural canals are ours, and we're filling them with nonsense -- courtesy of hosts Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar. BRAAAP BRAAAP! New episode every Friday afternoon!

For our extra-special and totally well-planned 10th anniversary episode, we gave Brian and Scott the night off so we could shame some truly terrible parents, make a list of our favorite overhyped cities, plan Ryan's imaginary political campaign, and review all the bad movies that came out four years ago. Starring Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep511.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We say way too many words about Pokemon, have our annual monster cereal discussion, divulge everything we know about memes, and guess what Dune is about. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep510.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Jared Petty returns to tell us why having a breakthrough case of COVID-19 really sucks and also explain why his stairs collapsed, and then we delve into the wild west of the early Internet. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep509.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Jared Petty is here to tell us about his new place, shed a tear for his favorite tree, and talk about all kinds of dumb comics and tabletop games and terrible technology. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep508.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Scott's latest boring white people vacation was at a weird haunted hotel, we discover that there are Yelp reviews of websites, we remember the times we got suckered by targeted ads, and Ryan imagines how he would handle real-life stadium events. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep507.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Kristin tells us about her Hawaiian vacation, we dig deep on Charles Entertainment Cheese, and everyone reveals how they would break up with Ryan. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep506.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We discuss the oeuvre of Jenna Jameson, discover that we are all Garfield, try to figure out what Miracle Whip is, and figure out what Ryan's stupid quest would be if he were Indiana Jones. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep505.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

In this very stupid episode, we make a Dungeons & Dragons alignment chart for fast food restaurants. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep504.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Max tells us about the weirdos he went to art school with, Kristin destroys her academic bell curve, and Brian recounts some house party fights. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep503.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

The Internet's #1 podcast for The Suicide Squad, boomerang shapes, jury duty tips, and Love Island theorycrafting. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep502.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We recount the secret history of the Predator, relive our memories of Blockbuster Video, share our favorite bad smells, read Amazon reviews of other people's favorite bad smells, and get taken on the world's stupidest office tour. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep501.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Wow, we've been making this nonsense for 500 episodes now! Our old pal Anthony Gallegos is back to help us celebrate, and also to school us on the art of motorcycle maintenance, provide an update on his menagerie, ponder the inner workings of Real Doll customer service, play us a jaunty tune on his penny whistle, and help us explain some of our stupider Comedy Button traditions to Kristin. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar, with special guest Anthony Gallegos.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep500.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Max pawns his cat off on some suckers, Brian reinforces this decision with cat horror stories aplenty, we wonder what our ideal jobs in space might be, and we imagine what a Comedy Button Freaky Friday would look like. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep499.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We ponder the Moana Lisa, Kristin confesses to her crimes, Scott tells his weird puke stories, we decide on the most stackable animals, and Max gets himself some Wolverine ice cream. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep498.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Sorry, everybody -- we made Ryan host again. Scott explains why he has no free time anymore, Brian learns how to smoke meat from flat-earthers, and we learn more about everybody's dorky high school life, Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep497.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It's the latest episode of the Comedy Button, the Internet's #1 fine art and movie podcast. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep496.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Settle in with us as we finally get some real pizza whistles and swazzle stars, and Scott tells us his wild and crazy Michigan tales about the fireworks factory and the world's stupidest pizza parlor. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep495.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Wrestling and comic books are all pretty dumb, cell phones make horror movies way less scary, Ryan has no idea what people do at bars, and we decide whether we would take drugs to find ghosts. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep494.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We learn that private schools even have ritzy bullies, Ryan tells us about all the coins he's hoarding for the boatman, Max books a sewer tour, and we come up with some terrible toy ideas. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep493.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We have a good old-fashioned debate about how bad the Lord of the Rings movies are, offer up some terrible ideas about all the stupidest food, and have a few close brushes with some Lovecraftian ocean beasts. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep492.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We do our annual check-in on monster cereal, Ryan returns to Benihana at long last, and we realize we're into a bunch of boring adult stuff now. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep491.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Welcome to the Comedy Button, your #1 source for mummy lore, mummy facts, and other mummy-related stuff. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep490.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It turns out you really CAN forget how to ride a bike, we don't know much about throwing balls around, bad horror movies are good horror movies, and we spend even more time babbling about hot dogs. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep489.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We vote on the world's most official best donuts list, identify the celebrities that definitely eat leftovers, and figure out what kinds of enchanted objects we would be. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep488.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Seth Macy returns to tell us about the old new Maine news, the new new Maine news, all the cool teen snacks of 20xx, downloading shareware games from the local BBS, and his favorite Hackers autograph. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar, with special guest Seth Macy.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep487.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We ring in poopin' season with some talk about the James Bonds, Max finds his stud finder (or did the stud finder find him?), we recount some dumb school assembly meetings, and we get some dirt on all those danged pot-smoking kids. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep486.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Kristin tells us about the Godzilla MonsterVerse, and then we learn the difference between tunnels and chunnels, and reminisce about the before times. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep485.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Ryan schools everybody on the best techno music, we try to rank the worst U.S. Presidents, Max tells us all about getting peed on by his infant, and we discuss that tried and true topic: porn on the Internet. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep484.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We're learning about the birds and the bees week, cuz Max is a BABBY DADDY! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep483.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It's time to eat some X-rated pizza, talk about TV shows we love that will be regarded as old people stuff in several years, recall our biggest high school scandals, and do some public intoxication. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep482.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

In an episode that is definitely kinda messed up because our podcasting platform's redesign unexpectedly broke our audio (sorry about that), Ryan has more fun with stupid sound effects, Brian tells us how Italians feel about The Godfather, Max braces for fatherhood, we contemplate the worst time to pass gas, and the world's saddest Burger King kids' meal get delivered. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep481.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Our recording software's new version sucks (except for the new sound board that Ryan's been tormenting everyone with), Scott had an encounter with some weird-ass beachgoers, Kristin explains Die Hard, and Paddington Bear is apparently packing something big under that coat. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep480.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Scott finds Ryan's old coffee stains, we reveal our dream casting for the Macho Man biopic, Medieval Times is apparently dealing with the pandemic rather well, and Brian's kid gets some life coaching. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep479.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Jared Petty joins us to talk about life on the farm (and the cultural paradox that is North Carolina), Kristin reveals her least-favorite part of the show, and we all tell some crazy neighbor stories. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep478.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We had a happy Saturday recording day to tell you all about the mile high club (not that one you sick sex pervert), throw down with an east coast vs. west coast debate, accidentally touch all the stuff at the store, and discover Kristin's love for IHOP. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep477.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Guest host Laura Kate Dale wrote an entire book about video game butts, so of course we need to talk all about it! Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar, with special guest Laura Kate Dale.

Buy Laura's book, "Things I Learned from Mario's Butt," @ https://amzn.to/3tOqA2d
Listen to Dice Funk @ https://apple.co/2ZaPOd6

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep476.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Scott's busy moving, Brian loves a good baseball bat of meat, Max wants a treadmill desk, Ryan never wants to board a cruise ship, and Kristin has the world's weirdest family tree. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep475.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Kristin gets a dog, we remember the most inappropriate things we've worn at work, the Ford Bronco is uncanceled, and we learn where to take Ryan on a date. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep474.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We talk about the world's weirdest robot movie, the most trivial things that made us cry, our personal showering policies, and how we got all these scars. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep473.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

What a stupid year 2021 already is! Let's forget about all that for a few minutes and talk about Brian's Costco check-out etiquette, Max's unexpectedly deep knowledge of Babar lore, the worst place to get diarrhea, and all the things we liked before they were cool. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep472.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We start 2021 off with a bang by clearing the air about some of our dumb and bad D&D ideas, learning about Oklahoma's official state drink, and provide some pro tips for all you young whippersnappers moving away from home for the first time (assuming that's the sort of thing people can do this year, of course). Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep471.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It's off to the haunted windmill in this fourth and final (for now) episode of the Comedy Button's Dungeons & Dragons campaign. The party loots some gross cinnamon buns, breaks everything, makes friends with a bloodthirsty sword, and learns that vampires might be giant incel manbabies. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep470_DD.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT