The Comedy Button
What's going on, Internet!? Prepare for some of the most insane rambling about everything from life, to sex, to what passes for 21st-century Internet culture. Your aural canals are ours, and we're filling them with nonsense -- courtesy of hosts Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Celebrate the end of the year with a bowl of liquor from our favorite weird bar, enjoy our new show "Will Ryan's Dog Eat More Things Than Ryan?" and learn some true facts about astronauts. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep417.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

The interminable year known as "2019" is finally coming to an end, and Max and Brian are drunk in an abandoned conference room at work to tell you about cookie exchanges, getting fat for the holidays, why they think Playmobil is popular in Maine, their love for stupid criminals, how the kid from Flight of the Navigator turned to armed robbery, Lorena Bobbitt, and why you should be careful if you drive a green Hyundai. Starring Brian Altano and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep416.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It's animal week on the Comedy Button: Brian made his family get a Christmas goose, horses wearing flippers are making the Internet great again, and Animorphs can move the heck over to make room for MIDDLEMORPHS! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep415.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Good news, everyone: 10 years in, we're still the #1 show, in all categories, everywhere. Well, except that Scott's gone and made a TV show, so that may be what finally knocks us down to #2 in the vaunted Star Wars Game Shows podcast category, where we have run unopposed since 1987. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep414.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It's a Thanksgiving miracle with the Comedy Button! This week, we talk about the worst food we've ever eaten, and all sorts of other goofs, guffaws, and hijinks that will drown out the sounds of your own family gathering! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep413.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Jack DeVries is back once again, and we've all had several wine spritzers. We discuss what our spirit fast food restaurants are, the most embarrassing clothes we wore in middle school, our self-care routines, and Bloodborne. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jack DeVries.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep412.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Jack DeVries joins us to discuss the X-Men, the 1997 Kevin Kline film "In and Out," who Kevin Kline is married to in real life, WikiFeet, the WikiFeet gift shop, and our favorite hard AND soft desserts. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jack DeVries.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep411.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

This week, we're joined by legendary chatterbox and walking almanac Jared Petty, so in lieu of asking him questions, we're just feeding him listener-submitted keywords and seeing what trivia, anecdotes, or confessions he conjures up. Topics include earwax, fireworks, Gashapon machines, and discontinued Planters snack food P.B. Crisp -- the last of which somehow devolves into a dissection of the relevance of Ian Fleming's James Bond novels in the 21st century. Starring Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep410.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

On this very special Halloween episode, Jared Petty joins us to talk about our favorite Halloween candy, Easter candy, Christmas candy, perennial non-denominational candy, and delight in our spooky stories -- like the time Scott's dad caught him touching himself while watching Hocus Pocus. Starring Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep409.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Brian has a wardrobe malfunction at a video game event, Max debates the merits of owning chickens, and Ryan is bad at Twitch. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep408.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It's just Max and Scott this week, so they imagine what they would have changed about their early 20s, and debate whether it would be better to eat chocolate-flavored poo or vice versa. Yeah, we get up to some weird nonsense when we're left alone-ish. Starring Scott Bromley and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep407.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Scott's better half, Stacey, joins us for the first time ever. What more could you ask for?! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Stacey Bromley.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep406.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Happy October! This week, we discover that Sunnyvale's former Toys R Us is now a Spirit store, and Geoffrey the Giraffe and his entire family are all dead. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep405.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We figure out the worst way to spend $1600, remember America's first Thanksgiving starring Mark Twain and Benjamin Franklin, and pitch Ryan on romantic dates with the rest of the cast. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep404.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We're joined once again by those foul-mouthed ladies, Kristin Van De Yar and Jenn Scoville. In addition to a rousing debate about hot air balloon etiquette and a fun game show in which we try to do Google's job, we also make good on last week's cliffhanger ending: ranking the top 10 anime hair styles of all time, divulging the secret origins of Jenn's screen name AND the meaning of the word "Weeaboo." Starring Brian Altano and Max Scoville, with special guests Jenn Scoville and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep403.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Max and Brian went to a German zoo, and Max ripped a real hooter of a fart in the monkey-house, scaring all the primates. Meanwhile, Jenn has a great idea for a western movie, and Kristin reveals her true feelings for Ron Perlman, that rectangular man made entirely of old wallets. Plus: a thrilling cliffhanger ending! Starring Brian Altano and Max Scoville, with special guests Jenn Scoville and Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep402.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Anthony joins us once again to discuss pooping at work, then we dare Ryan to drink horrible sodas. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Anthony Gallegos.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep401.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Our pal Anthony Gallegos is back to celebrate our 400th episode spectacular, and we've got a lot of catching up to do about exactly how many animals he lives with these days. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Anthony Gallegos.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep400.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Guten tag! Hallo und willkommen auf der Comedy-Schaltflache! We sure hope Google Translate got that right. It's the Comedy Button, all the way from Cologne, Germany -- where Brian and Max are off playing video games and eating various sausages for a week. We're international, baby! Starring Brian Altano and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep399.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Special guests Brandon Hunt and Eric Sapp join us to talk about their new project, HVYSTRK, and discuss "content" creation, growing up on the Internet, memes, Evangelion, Midsommar, and Tubgirl, among other things. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guests Brandon Hunt and Eric Sapp.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep398.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We ponder the Cheeto chicken sammich, recall the craziest things we've seen at San Diego Comic-Con, and solve the unsolved mysteries of the macabre. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep397.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We debate the merits of Where's Waldo, animal dildos, and whether we'd rather have all food look or taste like chicken fingers. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep396.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Does Ryan work from home naked? Does Batman really smell during the holidays? Did Brian's trip to the zoo with his daughter wind up as stupid as the time when he went with the rest of us? Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep395.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We sure miss the good old day of video game journalism and porn stars. Oh, and Max went to Hawaii. Insert joke here about getting lei'd, or something! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep394.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Buckle up for a little something we call Max and Brian's Excellent Florida Alligator Adventure! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Be sure to check out Brian and Max's rad alligator video over at IGN, made possible by the talented Christopher Gillette and Gabby Nikolle (and you can subscribe to their YouTube channel as well, for all kinds of other awesome animal stuff).

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep393.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Jared tells us about his vision quest to Hawaii, Ryan tells us about his (possibly only) trip to the ocean, and Brian tells us about the hottest new energy drink of 2019. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Ryan Scott, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep392.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Guest host Jared Petty returns to reminisce about making weird soda cocktails, help us figure out WTF is up with Applebee's, and play a quick round of "Which Person Would You Eat?" Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Ryan Scott, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep391.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Scott and Ryan are home alone! You know what that means: candy dinner, Disney karaoke, swapping stories about our wives, talking about weird dumb movies, and doing only the easy chores. Starring Scott Bromley and Ryan Scott.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep390.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Can you tell the difference between an actual rhino birth and Ace Ventura coming out of its butt? And if so, can you explain it to us? Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep389.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Welcome to phase 1 of the Macho Man Slim Jim Cinematic Universe. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep388.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We discover the perfect director for our upcoming cinematic universe, ponder all the gross stuff we've probably eaten at restaurants, and consider -- in pretty careful detail -- what it would take to make the realest-looking fake Cinnabon with stuff we found at Home Depot. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep387.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Max and Brian managed to find the weirdest bathroom in all of San Francisco. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep386.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Emmy Award-winning writer/producer Scott Bromley! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep385.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 10:00am PDT

It's time to talk about Danzig for like six hours straight, then design our own custom Ninja Turtle pizzas and ponder millennial midlife crises. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Brandon Hunt.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep384.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We debate the nuances of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles' characterization, remember our backyard funerals for our fallen G.I. Joes, and analyze to what extent Playmobil has lost its mind. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Brandon Hunt.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep383.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Ryan tells us about his dad's wedding, Scott shares life hacks for San Francisco weed delivery services, Brian discovers how good Chicago's cuisine is, and we all make fun of each other's recent Amazon purchase history. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Ryan Scott.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep382.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Special guest Lucy O'Brien teaches us about New Zealand, and Wikihow teaches us how to do sex things. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Lucy O'Brien.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep381.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Kristin Van De Yar is back again this week to drop a bombshell on us: She was a Sega kid. Everything makes sense now! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep380.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Kristin Van De Yar returns to share her thoughts on Lucky Charms, posterior entertainment, Tinder, and nonsense foods. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville, with special guest Kristin Van De Yar.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep379.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Grocery Outlet is gross, the Mythbusters are wrecking homes, and we make some difficult choices about what food we'd want to be stuck with for an entire year. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep378.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Max and Brian do their best to explain the mysteries of the urinal to Jenn. Other topics include the Amish, how to spend a million bucks like an idiot, and true horror stories of public embarrassment. Starring Brian Altano and Max Scoville, with special guest Jenn Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep377.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Since Ryan isn't here to babble endlessly about the Suicide Squad, we take the opportunity to describe our dream superhero movies. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep376.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

For your listening pleasure, we present the world's most authoritative and expertly curated collection of Hamburglar lore. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep375.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We reveal our carefully-thought-out fan cast for a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot, hear horror stories about Scott's vacation to a nudist colony, and learn that Ryan has no idea about what a child's birthday party should entail. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep374.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We learned more than we bargained for about Max's weird back hair, which is equal parts "werewolf ass" and "police sketch artist's rendition of Satan." Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep373.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

All hail Jared Petty, King of Ropes! Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Ryan Scott, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep372.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

It's poopin' day at Scott's house, and guest host Jared Petty is here for the festivities. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Ryan Scott, with special guest Jared Petty.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep371.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

The Comedy Button: Your most trusted source for the worst smells on Earth. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep370.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

7-Eleven doesn't have a mascot, so we made up a cool werewolf for them. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep369.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

We reminisce about our favorite school lunches, quiz Ryan about exactly what the hell a Dungeon Master is, and try to figure out who bought all of the saddest toys at Kay Bee. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep368.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Which one of us paid a visit to Ikea on Christmas Eve? Has Scott had relations with his weird sex egg yet? And could Ryan get here in the time that it would take us to fly to Texas and back? Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep367.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT

Wow, 2019 sure is amazing, isn't it? Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, and Max Scoville.

Direct download: ComedyButton_Ep366.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 9:00am PDT